Pumpkins

a poem you write when a certain food reminds you of a person.

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash.

I had pumpkins for breakfast

and it reminded me of you

my friends are through their first semester

and I wondered what it would be like if you knew

that I have been out of college

for more than a month or two

if you would still be proud of the daughter

who picked up guitar and your JVC camcorder.

I don’t really know what I’m running away from

or why I dream of passport stamps

jumping off cliffs

and some hair in a bun, fleur-de-lis tattooed guy from Greece.

I like to believe

just like how it happened when I told you I love you for the first time

dad, you heard my voice shaking on the other end

and you hold your breath

for five seconds or so

I’m curling my toes

regretting to have let go of those words

finally, the line brings in your response

“love you too”

No matter where I’m calling from

that’s the only response I’ll ever know.

I’ll eat pumpkins for dinner

and I know you’re proud of me

I know, I just know.

I originally wanted to write a poem about my dad and I, and was thinking to touch on the themes of dementia. But I reminded myself that dementia isn’t all there is when I think about our relationship, there are other parts too, from the past, right now, and more to come. Here is one from childhood. I remember him coming home from travel, after days and months of missing him. I can almost still feel the warmth of those nights, when pumpkins were part of dinner, and their leftovers be part of breakfast. He would tell me eating pumpkins made you smart, so I ate them all the more. And all the more I love them, because of my dad.

Do you have a particular food you like or just eat because of someone you love? What is it and who’s that person? Let me know in the comments, or write me an email. Lots of love to you!